Mother who suffers from severe bouts of depression

"Yes, my kids will think I'm crazy. That's the right of kids. It's what they do when not shoving the cat into the dryer or marking walls with impressionist crayon art.

"This book will give them plenty of fodder for future arguments, for which they'll neglect to thank me. Perhaps they'll be pissed that I made their eventual rebellion too easy."

- Martini, Adrienne. Hillbilly Gothic.